April 02, 2005

Berkeley High's Finest

As you may have gathered from reading my past entries, I am not a fan of the crazy bums in Berkeley. However, in reality, bums are only one part of the reason I hate the City of Berkeley with great passion. Tonight, while at a house party (as opposed to a bar) in Berkeley for the first time in several months, I was reacquainted with the other, equally passion-invoking source of my hatred.

While I've always biased my writing towards the worthless Berkeley homeless, an equally strong menace on the street is the wide assortment of sketchy individuals, usually rising from the depths of decidely shady high schools across the greater Oakland/Berkeley/El Cerrito area, or as I like to classify them, Berkeley High's Finest (BHF). These individuals, unlike the lunatic homeless, are not people readily dismissed, insulted, or ignored. Quick-tempered, notoriously intrusive, and often violent, BHF individuals are regulars at most Berkeley house parties, and can indubitably be found at any and all shitty bars/clubs that cater to freshman (e.g., Blake's or Kip's), fighting one another on weekends. Worse, their arrival at a party inevitably foreshadows one of two conclusions: the termination of the party to get them out or a fight which brings police, medics, and drama. Although almost every house party I have ever been to in Berkeley has had to deal with this issue in the course of the night, tonight reminded me of how much I hate these assholes, when the BHF breaking down a door brought the party I was at to an abrupt and unfulfilling conclusion.

The fact of the matter is, as much as I hate bums (and believe me, words don't really describe my hatred, although that never stops me from trying), I don't particularly fear them. For me, the insane homeless are like cockroaches - unwanted, unclean, and obnoxious, but ultimately irrelevant, even given the futility of my own existence. On the other hand, the BHF are people actually worthy of fear - a definite clear and present danger. Their intrusive, aggressive, and belligerant behavior never fails to ruin my evening nor make me wonder why I ever left the house in the first place. Even if they can be successfully expelled from a party, the fear of their unwanted return usually destroys the mood anyway.

Honestly, as much as I detest the crazy Berkeley bums, I would take them over BHF felons any day of the week. While the bums may annoy you to no end and say stupid shit, you can be pretty comfortable in the knowledge that they probably won't harm you; no such guarantees exist with the latter group and I've been in plenty of situations where innocent people actually got hurt. Tonight reminds me of why we have police, prisons, guns, and handcuffs. Some people just don't deserve to be allowed to roam free in society.